A Honda-Driving Ballet Mom
I never thought the first brand new car that I would drive would EVER be this.
But, yes folks. It’s true. I am now the proud owner of a blue 2008 Honda Odyssey Touring Edition (I’m calling her Daphne). Our old cars were getting to a point where the annual maintenance costs were getting to be more then they are worth. So, we’re sucking it up and accepting our loss of what “cool” we have left in our lives.
That said, we’re very pleased with what we’ve got. It has all the bells and whistles including navigation and a DVD player (which is reserved for long car trips and when mommy needs to bribe the kids into being good special occasions. We opted for the ‘08 ’cause the only significant difference between the ‘08 and ‘09 was about four grand. For four grand, I can deal with driving a car that’s been on the lot since May.
I can also deal with the image. I keep telling myself that I can be Homer’s HotWife driving a vehicle that can carry more than half of a soccer team. I can still rock out to Death By Stereo while Boo watches My Little Pony on the DVD with her headphones.
While I’m not as much of a bad girl as Everclear’s Volvo-Driving Soccer Mom, I can still be one tarty Honda-driving Ballet Mom. Right?
Play this ditty and sing along with my lyrics. It’s my new theme song.
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na
You know I used to be a bad girl
I got a real big wedgie when I surfed in a thong
Yeah I used to be a smart ass at my school’s debate club
But now I know my right wing from my wrong
Yeah, yeah
I really used to be a bad girl
I had a mixed up childhood like a crazy sitcom
I know I used to be a real wild child
But now I am a Honda-driving ballet mom
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na
I really used to be a bad girl
I got busted cheatin’ grandma at a game of mahjongg.
I used to love to do the things they tell me not to do
But now I’m different–now I sing a new song
I really used to be a bad girl
I was a fashion nightmare at my high school prom
Yes, I used to be a real wild child
But now I am a Honda-driving ballet mom
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na
Where do all the rock stars go
When the lights go down?
I wonder where all the rock stars go
‘Cause when you need one, they are never around
I think they moved out to the suburbs
And now they’re blond, smart, middle-class Democrat wives
They all have blonde, smart, middle-class Democrat children
Blonde, smart, middle-class Democrat lives
Where do all the rock stars go
When the lights go down?
I think I know where all the rock stars go
They all become Honda-driving ballet moms
Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na
Yep. This is my life. These are my boots. This is my dashboard and my steering wheel and my navigation system. You know you want me. HA!
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Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas by Nancy Syzdek is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.
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LOL! Congrats on the new purchase!
Grats on the new car!
hahaha… love the lyrics!
I’m not sure if it is a good sign or a bad one, for you, that I think your roll’n in style, but I like the new ride
Congrats on the purchase!
Love the ride – it is the sexy mama ride of the year!
I’ll never forget the first evening my husband and I went out in the van without the kids. Some teens merged right in front of us, and my husband said, ‘danged kids.’ I just looked him and said, ‘yeah, and those danged kids are laughing at grampa driving the van they left in the dust.’
Oops hit submit too soon. My husband just screwed up his face and started laughing. Gah.
[...] 10. I became a Honda-Driving Ballet Mom. [...]
[...] I went to lunch today with some former co-workers/friends. Afterward, I was thrilled to show off my new wheels. [...]
[...] Yes, it’s a minivan. I know it’s not cool, but I’ve never been cool, so it doesn’t really matter to me. With the other changes in my life, I may have to trade it in for something more reasonable, but for now, I love being a Honda-Driving Ballet Mom. [...]
How does it become your car when Homer pays the bills? I don’t get it
Hmmmm. Interesting comment. Actually I paid my fair share and then some.
I love the picture with your boots! Sexy with the leather steering wheel next to them. I can just smell all that warm leather and the new heater smell (If you had it on when you took the picture). Congrats on the Van!
Hi. I left the last post about your boots (which are very sexy I might add again). Thanks for the reply. I was wondering if you had the heater on when you took that picture and you knew the leather smell and warm heater smell I was talking about. My honda accord has those smells. I love them.