Fear & Parenting in Las Vegas

Family fun in Sin City.

A Blessed Life: Red Lotus Mama

I couldn’t think of a better person to lead off my week of blessed guest posts than with one of my BFF Plurkeetas, Red Lotus Mama. Every time I start printing invites to my own personal pity party, I remember her struggle, her strength, and, most of all, her courage to do what many women cannot do – leave an unhealthy relationship. Here’s her post. Read in awe as I have. Subscribe to her site (as I have) and join her fan club.

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When fandpinlv was looking for guest bloggers I was the first to volunteer. She has been such a comfort to me in the past three months. So, let me introduce myself. I am Red Lotus Mama. I have an adorable three-year-old daughter and I recently made the difficult decision of leaving my husband.

Becoming a divorcee and a single mom was never part of my personal fairy tale. My impression of a “blessed” life was finding a prince and living happily ever after. I thought my friends with the picture perfect marriages and cherubic looking kids were “blessed” while I was “cursed” with a prince who turned back into a frog. The only blessing I thought I had was our daughter.

I figured I had to take control of my situation if I was going to survive my curse. I picked up a few single mother self-help books, found a therapist and support group. I burned incense, got a Buddha and put on a Hamsa bracelet to help ward off the evil and bring good luck. I have cried, stressed out and lost weight.  After a couple of months, the chaos of my new life settled down and I discovered that I am actually very blessed.

There are the obvious blessings:
- less dishes and laundry to do
- control of the remote control (when my daughter is asleep)
- the house stays clean
- knowing how and where my money is spent
- bills are lower

Then there are the less obvious blessings:
- our health is better because there is less stress in clutter in the house
- bedtime and dinner time routine is easier
- I have more time to write when my daughter is visiting with her father

Finally, there are the invaluable blessings:
- I know that I can provide for my daughter and myself
- I know that my daughter is happier because her father is finally spending quality time with her when he is with her
- I know I am strong enough to be on my own and that I don’t need a marriage to define me
- I know who my real friends and family are

These blessings were waiting for me to accept and recognize them. Once I opened my heart to allow them in I was able to find my strength again. I am able to see my life as it is as a blessing.

November 16, 2008 Posted by fearandparentinginlasvegas | Stuff that makes me cry, Stuff that makes me happy, Stuff that makes me think | , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Five Things

I’ve been tagged by my RW Buddy, Perpstu, for five fascinating things about me. Of course, I think everything about me is fascinating.

(excuse me while I go and put my ego in check)

Grunt
Squeeze
Wiggle
Ugh
Ahh. There it goes.

(okay all you nasty-minded buggers out there – get your head out of the gutter)

Here are five things that I think are a bit unusual about me.

1. I used to own a surfboard and yes, I did know how to use it.
2. I’m a leadership-a-holic. It’s rare that I can be a part of a group/organization/association without getting recruited to help run in it in some way or another.
3. I’ve had two pet rats in my lifetime — Amanda I had as a child, I had Emily when I was in my 20’s.
4. I won a scrapbooking award for a page I did about my miscarriage. Ironically, I conceived Boo the same weekend.
5. I tried to induce labor with Boo (who was a week late) by walking my neighborhood and conviincing area residents that putting an inpatient mental hospital a few blocks away was a good idea. They built the hospital (yea!), but it did nothing for my labor (boo!).

Speaking of labor, one of my fellow Vegas parent bloggers, VegasDad over at iVegasFamily and his HotMamma are about to welcome their second son to the family. (Hot Mamma’s getting induced on Monday).

I know from personal experience that the shift from one to two is a big exercise in air traffic control. So, I’m hosting a virtual baby shower here. Please help me wish the many blessings by bestowing a bunch of unsolicited parenting advice here in the comments. Be sure to add iVegasFamily to your reader so you can keep tabs on his news!

November 16, 2008 Posted by fearandparentinginlasvegas | Uncategorized | | 5 Comments

On the Road Again


After spending four-plus years pretty much stapled to Las Vegas in my last job, my new job is putting me on more planes in the first few months than I’ve been on the last four years. The travel is a double-edged sword. Of course, I miss Homer terribly and the kids even more. I always leave something mission-critical behind (e.g., toothbrush, hairbrush, socks, etc.). I’ve left stuff in hotel rooms. I’ve had stuff stolen from hotel rooms (that’s a story in and of itself and if you want it, you’ll have to ask me to guest post it — because it won’t be here in this lifetime!). All the travel seems to put my life into a blender.

Travel can be a blessing though. I’ve stayed at a Disneyland resort hotel that I would have never been able to afford to stay in otherwise. I got to bring Homer and the kids down to have fun while I worked. I get to meet interesting people and see places I may never have seen. I get interesting fodder for my blog. I get out of the way at home so Homer can do things his way and I get reminded that “the ship” back home can sail on just fine with a different captain.

This time of year, Homer travels quite a bit. In fact, he’s been south of the border (and I’m not talking Taco Bell, folks) since Tuesday. In the last five days, I’ve had to juggle all of my duties and his (which include dropping the kids off in the morning and picking at least one up in the evening, paying bills, taking turns at bedtime, and a ton of other stuff that I forget about until he’s gone). I am blessed to have such a wonderful life partner, best friend and co-parent. I am also blessed to have an extended family close by who can help fill in the gaps while he’s gone. Without them, birthday parties, ballet classes, and hair appointments would not be happening this week.

Speaking of filling in the gaps, I’m hitting the road again before the crack of dawn on Monday. I’m not sure what my access will be while I’m traveling, so I’ve hornswaggled boondoggled recruited five of my favorite residents of Plurkville to help fill in the gaps while I’m gone.

So, here’s the lineup:

So be sure to come back and check out the fabulous tales of blessings from this crew. I, for one, can’t wait to see what comes up.

Are you going to miss me? If you just can’t cope without your daily dose of snarky Vegas love, you can read some of my recent posts at The Imperfect Parent and Savvy Source Las Vegas, including:

November 16, 2008 Posted by fearandparentinginlasvegas | Stuff that makes me drink, Stuff that makes me happy, Stuff that makes me laugh, Stuff that makes me tired | | 4 Comments